You know what's different? My belly button. That and a few other things in my life including my sleep cycle and the conversations I have with my husband:
Me: "I just changed her."
Jeff: "Oh nice. Did she poop?"
Me: "Yeah. Quite a bit."
Jeff: "That's my girl."
This week I returned to work and so far so good. I instantly went back into project manager mode and when I'm at the office it feels like I never left. By mid afternoon I actually forget I'm a mom. But then I have to pump (my boobs!) which is just about as real as reminders get. My brain was made for management and when I'm clicking away at my laptop I get a natural high off of organizing things beyond bath time and stroller rides.
But don't get me wrong, a big part of my soul is sad when I'm not around our daughter. Our nanny sent me a photo this week of Natalie in her stroller happy as a clam during a walk and I was slightly jealous I wasn't the one pushing her around.
But alas, it's the new normal. We've got a kid and she's got a nanny and I'm back at work typing emails. There might be moments of sadness but at least for now, I'm giddy to be back at work.
I'm also giddy about calling our parents Grandma and Grandpa. I think it's funny. Your whole life you call your parents Mom and Dad then you have a kid and their names change. They become the head of their family and that changes things. Instead of going to your own grandparents houses for holidays and weekend get-togethers, your parents become the new destination. New traditions are formed and it's exciting.
I had an old friend message me last week asking for advice on having kids. She explained she's been thinking a lot lately about whether she herself wants kids of her own and asked how I knew I wanted to be a Mom. I explained that I've known my whole life but that honestly, one of the more selfish parts of knowing was that one day I'll be in my parents shoes going from Mom to Grandma. I hope that in our future, Jeff and I will be the heads of our family and we'll be the ones visited by our kids on weekends. We'll be the ones showing photos of our grandkids to our friends and we'll be the ones handing them back to their parents when they need their diaper changed - isn't that just the joke of the month!
All in all, being a Mom feels natural... even with the new belly button.
In other news, Jeff finished the front yard project and it turned out pretty great. He was going for a clean look using landscaping requiring little to no maintenance consisting mostly of bushes and rocks. I did my part by helping select ferns for our hanging baskets. Next steps include painting the porch floor and steps, as well as the front door. We also found an adorable little antique swing that needs painting and after will be hung on the porch for Nat.
